How to tell parents * about your mental health concerns?

* mostly to the mother-father, but also more broadly to the foster parent, grandparent, older sibling or some other relative or trusted adult

General tips for talking to a parent:
  • Choose a good time to talk - when you are both calm and you have time.
  • If talking seems too tense, you can also send your thoughts by letter. You can also use messaging applications if it seems more convenient.
  • If you have researched yourself and find that you have a problem, such as depression or anxiety, you can share information so that the parent can find out more about it as well.
  • Let me know what you're waiting for - just to be heard; so that the parent can explain your behavior; or you want some specific activities or advice (eg for a loved one to help you make time with the psychologist and, if you want, to go there together).
  • Think about what you are saying, tell the story to yourself first, or write it down.
  • If you have been hurt by sharing your feelings-thoughts-experiences, don't give up.
  • There are certainly other adults who can understand you who have more experience with mental health.
  • Keep in mind that the conversation can be tense for both you and your loved one - plan something relaxing or sporty afterwards.
  • Note that some people may say something stupid or accusing, painful.
  • Note that parents may need some time to reflect on what you have said. Sometimes they may feel guilty about your difficulty and therefore need to overcome their feeling first.
It seems to me that I may have a mental health problem. How to tell a parent about it?

Step 1: Think about what you want to say, practice.

Step 2: Find a suitable time and place. For example, you could say, "I need to talk to you about one important thing - when would it be right for you?"

Step 3: Describe what you feel and need. For example: “I feel ... (sad, anxious, lonely, irritated, I have a very hard time concentrating, I have slept badly). Help me find a psychologist / doctor… It's very important to me that you listen to me and try to understand what's going on with me ”.”

Step 4: Make a plan together for who will do what next and when. For example: my mother is looking for a psychologist and I am trying to use some self-help tricks. Next time we'll talk the day after tomorrow.

Step 5: Do something enjoyable and relaxing.

What if my mom or dad says I can't have this problem?

Give him some time to adjust. Send him experience stories where young people talk about their experiences (you can find them in from here or from here). Talk to someone else you trust. write To the Advisor to Peaasi.ee.

What if my mother or father says I don't need to go to a psychologist (or other mental health professional)?

Your parents may need more information or time to adjust. Write yourself either The main thing or Lahendus.neti advisers, discuss the situation with them. Find out if there is a psychologist at your school and ask him or her to help you think about how to talk to your parents. Know that you also have the right to decide on your need for help and see a doctor directly.

You can get help from e-counseling, a school psychologist, you can also turn to a family doctor. You can find contacts for help From the Lahendus.net database.

I would like to go to a psychologist, psychiatrist or other mental health professional. How does it work?

The Peaasi.ee page has step-by-step instructions for contacting a specialist. There you will find information on when it is worth seeking help from a specialist, which specialist to go to and how to do it in more detail. You can also share it with a loved one who you want to ask for help to turn to a specialist - then he or she can get to know him or her exactly.

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